Most people have mixed feelings concerning feeling and expressing anger. varied influences counsel everything from active extreme self-control, holding it beat (end result: stoicism) to showing no boundaries concerning sharing anger at all(end result: anarchy). Finding the center ground is that the place wherever you’ll be able to communicate feelings and therefore the facts of a given scenario, while not symptom or blaming the opposite party, and the other way around. once this 1st situation happens, you’re making more room for positive communication changes to occur. once communication is a smaller amount than ideal, continued to specific anger in previous ways in which can reinforce previous habits., exasperating associate degree already troublesome scenario.
I’m recommending the subsequent journal exercises to help you to find a lot of positive ways in which to specific your anger and become a higher somebody. once I have shared my feelings, and therefore the different party has been receptive, I have been stunned at however calm I became, compared to however uncomfortable, I felt before sharing my feelings. I even have had some things wherever I either did not receive a response or the opposite party remained silent. what’s most vital in any scenario, is that I reached out and commenced the method.
Your favorite Exercise listing:
ANGER SCRIBBLE:
When you have a robust reaction to a scenario, begin to hope and pen it. bear in mind to incorporate a close description of your robust feelings together with the facts of things. bear in mind to use the maximum amount house on a page as you’ll be able to once you scribble. when filling a page, select one scribble, and begin drawing a selected form over your scribble. still, scribble over the form till you’re finished. (e.g. you will feel tired or mitigated. Your words could hamper otherwise you could run out of your time to jot down.) once you notice any of those reactions, it is time to prevent writing. Wait many minutes for everything to settle, then move to subsequent exercise. (Note: you will substitute any ritual here if praying is not a decent acceptable you.)
UNSENT LETTERS:
This exercise is a good thanks to communicating feelings and data to yourself or to somebody else. you’ll be able to write unsent letters, once it would rather be hurtful to talk on to the opposite party(es) you’ll be able to conjointly write unsent letters on any topic (positive or negative). unsent letters conjointly offer a good place to apply your lines. whether or not you write a series of unsent letters or one letter, your feelings can diminish intense. Then you’ll be able to prepare to possess a relaxed speech with the opposite party. you’ll be able to write as several unsent letters as you wish. once you write your unsent letters, you provide yourself permission to feel the extreme emotions that surface around a selected event. At some purpose either throughout, instantly or when you’ve got written your letter, you’ll gain clarity concerning your half within the scenario. you’ll conjointly learn to gauge your responsibility yet because the different party’s responsibility within the same scenario. once you square measure calm once more, you’ll be a lot of ready to form changes, together with inquiring for a lot of specific communication amendment from the opposite party. you’ll be able to still follow up your unsent letters with prayers of blessing for the opposite party. As you still bless the opposite party, space is created for positive changes to happen in yourself and therefore the different party. once you write an associate degree unsent letter, it demonstrates your courageousness and disposition, to form serious changes in an exceedingly troublesome scenario.
WRITING A DIALOGUE:
Writing associate degree imaginary or real speech you had with the opposite party, will facilitate set free a number of your anger. It’s helpful to place words or pictures to your feelings. begin your dialogue with 2 voices, the letter “A” (for your voice) and “B” (for the opposite person’s voice). make certain to permit each voice’s time to talk.
Don’t worry about writing an ideal dialogue. Use the maximum amount of detail as you’ll be able to. Your descriptive skills can improve with every unsent letter that you simply write. for instance, if I feel my anger burning like a fireplace, then I might need to mention “I’m burning up over this case. If I’m feeling a way of enmity (something deep, quiet, and extremely intense, that ne’er quite goes away, then I would say, “I’m very annoyed a couple of currently, will we have a tendency to cite it for many minutes?” bear in mind that no intense feeling is value ignoring. It’s far better to specific your feelings many at a time than to pay the worth of these same feelings inflicting issues for you within the future.
“I AM FEELING” STATEMENTS:
Writing sentences that begin with “I am feeling .” could be a great way to verbalize all of your feelings a couple of troublesome scenarios. i would like to cue you that will categorical different feelings at the side of your anger. once you begin your journaling, concentrate on your anger 1st, then pen your different feelings. I counsel that you simply write a minimum of 10 feeling statements. place the list away. go to subsequent exercise.
DRAW A PICTURE:
Draw many photos of your anger. all kinds of drawing square measure allowed. bear in mind what I same concerning “My anger is burning.” Write a visible image of your anger. I would like you to use as several senses in your image as you’ll be able to. (Note: you will conjointly use this exercise to examine different robust feelings)
COMBINE WORDS AND PICTURES:
Now explore your list of “I am” sentences. Match as several of your picture(s) along with your “I am feeling.” sentences as you’ll be able to. (For example, I’m feeling angry concerning. put an image of a heart next to the written statement. once you square measure finished, circle one or 2 mixtures that best describe your current feelings. make certain to jot down an outline sentence concerning your 2 decisions.
STARTING CLOSURE:
Let’s stop and review the work you’ve got already done. you’ve got written associate degree initial unsent letter concerning your home reserve er. you’ve got explored a number of your feelings intimately. you’ve got summarized your feelings employing a combination of drawing and writing. currently, write one action you’ll have taken to stay the sooner scenario from fast. Write another sentence describing one action that the opposite party may have taken. Write down one positive action you’re willing to require to alter your anger expression currently, bear in mind to incorporate a selected completion time and date. If you pray, begin praying permanently to return to the opposite party. i might advocate that you simply pray for a minimum of many times every week operating up to praying daily for a month or till your robust negative feelings disappear.
Take some time operating through these exercises. If you discover yourself, unable to maneuver on to subsequent exercise. Then write a brief paragraph on why you do not need to maneuver on. Take an occasion and begin the new exercise the subsequent day. foresee celebrating your freedom from past buried feelings.
